Out of the Flames began as a fan fiction story set in the world of Showtime’s The L Word. I’m a devoted TiBetter, who would rather forget the sixth season ever happened—other than Bette & Tina’s happy ending. Flames was the fourth novel-length piece I posted on LesFan.com, home of the world’s most extensive collection of B&T tales. I approached each fanfiction story by reinventing my favorite couple. I threw them in a new location and gave them careers, friends, and drama, much different from the original series. In other words, they were my own stories and characters with a built-in fan fiction readership.

At the heart of Flames is Manhattan Sloane, a kickass San Francisco police detective. Is she anything like me? Other than her East Bay Area roots, criminal justice degree, and several years as a cop and investigator (mine in the military), I’d have to say no. My friends tell me otherwise. They point out that, like me, Sloane faces tragedy but comes out the other side stronger and more determined. I say that’s every woman I know. In essence, Sloane is every fierce, loyal, yet flawed woman in my life.

Sloane’s greatest fear is fire and the destruction it brings. It’s also one of mine. When I was growing up, wildfires threatened our family home twice, once trapping our town in a fiery ring. We escaped both times without a scratch, but that heightened sense of fear never left me. Don’t even think about giving me a candle for Christmas.

Why San Francisco? I grew up in the East Bay Area at a time when San Francisco was depicted in television and movies as the fantastical center of counterculture and social reform. And all of that was right in my backyard. The City became this mythical place like Dorothy’s Oz—shiny, magical, and unreachable. Now, with all the awareness that comes with adulthood, San Francisco is beautiful and dirty, cultured and uncivilized, and a home I don’t recognize. In Manhattan Sloane’s world, I created a version of San Francisco that transported me back to childhood, yet had a footing in reality."

From the Ashes, like its predecessor Out of the Flames, began as a fanfiction story set in the world of Showtime’s The L Word with Bette and Tina, now Sloane and Finn, at the helm. About halfway through drafting Flames, when I’d hit Manhattan Sloane with her first devastating blow, I knew right then I wasn’t done challenging her. That’s when I started outlining Ashes. In fact, the same day I typed “The End” in Flames, I began cranking out the first chapter of Ashes. That’s how connected I was to the story that reflected much of the challenges I faced in my personal life at the time—four strokes over two years. I decided to throw one obstacle after another at Sloane and see how she made it through the other side, hoping I’d do the same.

I started with this scenario: Imagine you’ve been through the worst imaginable hell. You claw your way back and now hold hope you’ll finally be okay. But you have a chance to put away more of the bad guys who put you through the wringer.

You’d take that chance, wouldn’t you? If you said yes, you’re a lot like Manhattan Sloane…and me. But ask yourself why. Is it because it’s the right thing? Or because it’s your chance to even the score? Before Sloane can answer that question for herself, I hit her with a second disastrous setback and pose her with a more consequential question: How far would you go to save someone you love?

If you want Sloane’s answer, you’ll have to read From the Ashes, the second installment of the Manhattan Sloane thriller series. 

Beyond the Smoke, the third installment of the Manhattan Sloane series, picks up six months after the end of its predecessor. Similar to how I linked Out of the Flames to From the Ashes, I grab onto the one loose end from the previous book and make that the driving force of this one.

I started with this premise: Is it possible to make a fresh start without first making peace with the past?

If you’ve lived long enough like I have, you’ve reached the point once or twice when the surrounding chaos is too much, and the only way forward is to hit the reset button. I had the advantage of serving in the Air Force, and whether or not I liked it, I picked up everything and moved every three years to a new place and a new job. I found the new job refreshing with each move, but I missed having roots—close friends and an extended family that I could count on.

I wanted to give Manhattan Sloane both, but not without stumbling blocks. After throwing everything at her in the first two books, she’s ready for that fresh start with Finn, Reagan, and a new career as a private investigator. I make the past—hers and Finn’s—her greatest obstacle. Sloane is my hero, so I give her the tools I never had that make it possible to clean the slate. The question is, does she use them to find her happily ever after?

To find out if Manhattan Sloane gets her fresh start, you’ll have to read Beyond the Smoke.